Have you ever had something important you were dressing up for? Perhaps the day that would be most important for that was your wedding day. You certainly wouldn't throw "some old thing" on and waltz down the aisle. You also wouldn't put your wedding gown on and just assume it looks fine. You want to stand in front of the mirror, make every necessary adjustment, tug this way, press it flatter here, and you are going to turn and examine that from every angle to make sure that what you see in the mirror is exactly what you want to see reflected.
Our children are our mirrors. And we are modeling in front of them. They observe every action, every word; every time we yell at our husband or criticize the way he handled something. The way we talk to the kids tells them that they are either : Worthwhile or Worthless. The way we love, or don't love, our husbands show them how to love, how to relate to their spouse when they grow up. What do they hear us say to our friends, or under our breath, or to our husbands, when we don't think they're listening? Are we complaining about them, about life in general? Are we building our man up, supporting him, believing in him, or are we tearing him down, undermining his every move? Not only will they mirror our behavior, but they will also equate God to be the way they perceive us to be. Is that a sobering thought or what? My actions dictate the way my children believe God to be. Wow!
My husband and I were able to go to a marriage retreat this past weekend. This topic of parenting came up in a couple of the sessions, and they talked about the kids being like mirrors. It isn't as if I'd never heard that concept before, or that I didn't know it to be a truth. The thing is, in the throes of life, the chaotic mess that is reality, it is the "path of least resistance" to just snap, be angry, say the sarcastic remark that so quickly jumps to the tip of the tongue... but, I don't want to take that easy path and at the end have ruined and damaged my children. I want to model to them an example of a loving wife; respecting and believing in my husband, loving him unconditionally. I want them see and know deep down in their heart of hearts that they are worth loving; they have value and purpose and it doesn't matter what culture and society tells them is "beautiful" or "intelligent" or "worthwhile" - They don't have to live up to what the world says.. God has created them with purpose, and they are beautiful and lovable for who they are, not what they do or what they look like, and certainly not by how much they have!
So, the phrase that I keep repeating over and over, and wrote in my little notebook given to me at the retreat, and the phrase that I want to be my motto : - Model what you want Mirrored -
"I can't do it, I'm going to fail!" is probably the thought that just went through your head, right? I know that's what went through my head at first as I listened and thought about how many times I've already failed. However, God is willing to do it, He wants to empower us, but we have to cooperate with Him. Nobody ever watched a baby that was trying to take its first steps and got irritated, went over and knocked the baby down, saying "You little fool, you can't walk!" When that baby stands up, and wobbles and sways back and forth, trying to take a step for the first time, there is awe, and cheering and video cameras because it is a monumental moment, one to be treasured and encouraged. Such is this journey to model in front of our little Mirrors.
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