The Bible says we should confess our faults one to another, and that is just what I'm going to do. I absolutely hate having to do family dinners! I hated them when I was a kid; I felt like a mouse in a trap. It was a miserable experience; don't do this, don't do that, do this, stop talking, etc. Not something I wanted to partake in at all. So, as soon as I was able, I escaped the torture, and avoided the trap ever since.
Recently God has been dealing in my heart, and my husband has been strongly communicating, that we need to do family dinners. Experts say that it is a very important aspect of a child's day, one that should be remembered as a fun time where the whole family shares and communicates and enjoys the fellowship. Um, excuse me, fun?????? Dinner??? That is an oxymoron, kind of like a speedy turtle. And we have tried over the years, believe me. We all cram around the table, sit down, and there is this false sense of peace for the first 60 seconds, and then all heck breaks loose, because the kids are fighting to speak, twisting around until drinks spill, getting totally carried away with the stories they're telling while food sits untouched, and my head is pounding so bad, and my input consists only of "Chew with your mouth closed." , "Sit down." , "Be careful, watch your drink!" and so on. By the time its done, nobody is enjoying anything, some of the kids are crying, I'm so stressed I don't even want to eat anymore,and everyone can't wait to get away from the table. So, my solution has been to just avoid eating with the family. I generally skip dinner, and do work in my office, print schoolwork, or some such thing that gives me a good reason to not be with the family during that time.
This last weekend, at our marriage conference, during one of the times parenting was being discussed, they asked us to allow God to speak to us about one thing that He would want us to change when we go home. Compliant, I closed my eyes, asked God to show me anything He wants changed because, of course, I want to do things His way. What do you think immediately came to my mind? That's right, family dinner. My heart sank in that instant, "God, I don't know how to do that! I've tried and failed, over and over." I realized that I had made a vow, so to speak, to never get trapped in a family dinner, and that I was letting my own issues keep me from making good memories with our kids. I was also really hurting my husband, because it is a very important thing to him, that we eat all together. I confessed that to God, asked Him to help me let go of my hatred for eating together, and to please give me grace to begin having good dinner time with the family.
We have eaten dinner together this week. We've begun playing a "High-Low" game at dinner - everyone takes a turn stating their high for the day, followed by the low of the day for them. It gives us things to talk about, hearing what everyone is dealing with that day, and gives an opportunity to know if something bad happened,or is being felt, that we need to deal with. The kids are absolutely loving that we are all sitting together and enjoying time together. I still am correcting about manners, but it is in my heart to do it kindly and not allow that to make dinner be stressful and torturous. My hubby is so thrilled that we're doing this, too. Funny how something that seemed so small to me could make such a difference.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Modeling in front of a Mirror
Have you ever had something important you were dressing up for? Perhaps the day that would be most important for that was your wedding day. You certainly wouldn't throw "some old thing" on and waltz down the aisle. You also wouldn't put your wedding gown on and just assume it looks fine. You want to stand in front of the mirror, make every necessary adjustment, tug this way, press it flatter here, and you are going to turn and examine that from every angle to make sure that what you see in the mirror is exactly what you want to see reflected.
Our children are our mirrors. And we are modeling in front of them. They observe every action, every word; every time we yell at our husband or criticize the way he handled something. The way we talk to the kids tells them that they are either : Worthwhile or Worthless. The way we love, or don't love, our husbands show them how to love, how to relate to their spouse when they grow up. What do they hear us say to our friends, or under our breath, or to our husbands, when we don't think they're listening? Are we complaining about them, about life in general? Are we building our man up, supporting him, believing in him, or are we tearing him down, undermining his every move? Not only will they mirror our behavior, but they will also equate God to be the way they perceive us to be. Is that a sobering thought or what? My actions dictate the way my children believe God to be. Wow!
My husband and I were able to go to a marriage retreat this past weekend. This topic of parenting came up in a couple of the sessions, and they talked about the kids being like mirrors. It isn't as if I'd never heard that concept before, or that I didn't know it to be a truth. The thing is, in the throes of life, the chaotic mess that is reality, it is the "path of least resistance" to just snap, be angry, say the sarcastic remark that so quickly jumps to the tip of the tongue... but, I don't want to take that easy path and at the end have ruined and damaged my children. I want to model to them an example of a loving wife; respecting and believing in my husband, loving him unconditionally. I want them see and know deep down in their heart of hearts that they are worth loving; they have value and purpose and it doesn't matter what culture and society tells them is "beautiful" or "intelligent" or "worthwhile" - They don't have to live up to what the world says.. God has created them with purpose, and they are beautiful and lovable for who they are, not what they do or what they look like, and certainly not by how much they have!
So, the phrase that I keep repeating over and over, and wrote in my little notebook given to me at the retreat, and the phrase that I want to be my motto : - Model what you want Mirrored -
"I can't do it, I'm going to fail!" is probably the thought that just went through your head, right? I know that's what went through my head at first as I listened and thought about how many times I've already failed. However, God is willing to do it, He wants to empower us, but we have to cooperate with Him. Nobody ever watched a baby that was trying to take its first steps and got irritated, went over and knocked the baby down, saying "You little fool, you can't walk!" When that baby stands up, and wobbles and sways back and forth, trying to take a step for the first time, there is awe, and cheering and video cameras because it is a monumental moment, one to be treasured and encouraged. Such is this journey to model in front of our little Mirrors.
Our children are our mirrors. And we are modeling in front of them. They observe every action, every word; every time we yell at our husband or criticize the way he handled something. The way we talk to the kids tells them that they are either : Worthwhile or Worthless. The way we love, or don't love, our husbands show them how to love, how to relate to their spouse when they grow up. What do they hear us say to our friends, or under our breath, or to our husbands, when we don't think they're listening? Are we complaining about them, about life in general? Are we building our man up, supporting him, believing in him, or are we tearing him down, undermining his every move? Not only will they mirror our behavior, but they will also equate God to be the way they perceive us to be. Is that a sobering thought or what? My actions dictate the way my children believe God to be. Wow!
My husband and I were able to go to a marriage retreat this past weekend. This topic of parenting came up in a couple of the sessions, and they talked about the kids being like mirrors. It isn't as if I'd never heard that concept before, or that I didn't know it to be a truth. The thing is, in the throes of life, the chaotic mess that is reality, it is the "path of least resistance" to just snap, be angry, say the sarcastic remark that so quickly jumps to the tip of the tongue... but, I don't want to take that easy path and at the end have ruined and damaged my children. I want to model to them an example of a loving wife; respecting and believing in my husband, loving him unconditionally. I want them see and know deep down in their heart of hearts that they are worth loving; they have value and purpose and it doesn't matter what culture and society tells them is "beautiful" or "intelligent" or "worthwhile" - They don't have to live up to what the world says.. God has created them with purpose, and they are beautiful and lovable for who they are, not what they do or what they look like, and certainly not by how much they have!
So, the phrase that I keep repeating over and over, and wrote in my little notebook given to me at the retreat, and the phrase that I want to be my motto : - Model what you want Mirrored -
"I can't do it, I'm going to fail!" is probably the thought that just went through your head, right? I know that's what went through my head at first as I listened and thought about how many times I've already failed. However, God is willing to do it, He wants to empower us, but we have to cooperate with Him. Nobody ever watched a baby that was trying to take its first steps and got irritated, went over and knocked the baby down, saying "You little fool, you can't walk!" When that baby stands up, and wobbles and sways back and forth, trying to take a step for the first time, there is awe, and cheering and video cameras because it is a monumental moment, one to be treasured and encouraged. Such is this journey to model in front of our little Mirrors.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Expectations
Anyone who knows me, knows that I tend to be a perfectionist. That tends to cause a lot of stress when things aren't "perfect". I get frustrated with myself, with my kids, with life in general. Well, resting/nap time today was anything but restful because my 2 and 4 year old decided that naps were just not happening. I had to discipline them, continue going into their rooms and taking toys away, and just having a generally stressful span of time. Following that, I was going over some schoolwork with my 8 year old, that he wasn't getting, and I was frustrated because I didn't know how to communicate it differently to him so that he would understand the concept. Anyway, he finished up his paper and went outside to play, and immediately started knocking on a window. I got instantly irritated, went over to the window and shook my head no. He cheerfully parrots my action of shaking the head "no", mouths the word "no", and gives me a thumbs up and a grin, then pedals his bike off around the porch. I should've just let his joyful spirit infect me, but instead, I turned around and ranted to my mom, "Why in the world would he start knocking on the window when he knows the baby is sleeping?" She shrugs, calmly (as is her wonderful nature), and says, "You'd have to ask him that question." Grrr, not good enough. I go on, "I have such smart kids, but I swear that they just don't think sometimes!!" She looked at me, and said, "You get frustrated with them for things that are just kids being kids. You expect them to think and act older, more mature, than they are. Kids forget, don't think the way we do, and as long as you expect them to, you will be stressed." That's all that was said at that point. However, it was not a done deal inside of me, because her statement bothered me. Should I not expect to have my kids obey me? When I've told them every day for the last several years that when its "quiet time", they need to be quiet, should I not expect them to remember that? So, I took it to God in prayer, and asked Him that very question. The thought that I had, that I believe was from God, stopped me in my tracks. I should have the same expectations in my kids that God has in me - none. How many times does the Bible tell us how we are to behave? I know right from wrong, I shouldn't get angry or yell at anyone, I should forgive people right away and not allow offense to settle inside of me, and yet, I struggle with those things, and many other sins. Is God disappointed in me every time I mess up? Absolutely not! He never has an expectation on me to perform a certain way. There are consequences to wrong choices, struggles that come from taking a wrong path, and there are losses of blessings that He wanted to give me, but He is never angry or disappointed in me. He lovingly chastens me, reiterates His will, the right way, and then allows me to make my choice. What right do I have, then, to have expectations in my children, or anyone else? None. That was, and is, a sobering thought. It is also something that I am totally incapable of doing. I told God that I choose to lay down my right to expect anything from people, especially my kids. I need His help to live that out, and it will take daily; uh, let's be honest, minute by minute prayer and dependence on Him to walk that out, but that is my heart's desire. I want to love and nurture my kids, not set high expectations upon them that they can't meet, only to make them feel inadequate. That would be an epic failure on my part, and a devastation to their sweet little spirits.
Disaster Zone!
The dilemna : My lovely daughters refuse to pick up their toys or their clothes. Every time I walk into their room, it looks as if a huge tornado just went through. I've spent hours helping them clean and organize, endless minutes showing them how to fold shirts and pants, how to hang their dresses... and yet, the result is the same every day : Danger: Disaster Zone! We have disciplined them, taken toys, taken away snack, threatened to take away special events that were upcoming, but to no avail. They can spend 2 hours up there "cleaning" and the room might actually look worse instead of better, when they're finished. I cannot possibly use enough words to explain the frustration, stress, anger, and even hopelessness that I have experienced over this whole situation. So, I was praying, and telling my husband that something has to change... we need a God-inspired idea that will cause change.
The solution : That came in the form of my mother. She brought some bins over, and said she will help me organize and take away everything the girls own for awhile. We spent 2 hours yesterday just cleaning up the toys, separating them and putting them away. Today we will tackle the clothing. The plan is to remove everything except their beds/bedding. Each day they will have to come and get an outfit from me (my choice, not theirs to ensure they care and want the privilege of having their clothes back), and get their pajamas from me at bedtime. After a period of time, we will put one outfit on their shelf,or in the drawer, so that they don't have to ask for it. If they put it in the laundry at the end of the day, we will give two outfits back the next day. If they take care of that, another outfit will be returned, and so on. The same is true with the toys - we will be giving them back one type of toy (i.e. kitchen set, baby dolls, books, etc.), play with them, teach them how to put it away properly, and then give them a chance to do that. If they keep it put away, we will give back another type of toy.
Next project : My son's room, followed by the toddler playroom, again. We will be getting rid of some toys, as well. That causes trouble, when the kids have too many things. They simply don't know how to put them away, or keep them picked up. It is overwhelming for them. Heck, it is overwhelming for me, so I know it has to overwhelm them even more. In the end, though, they are learning good life skills of organization and having respect for their possessions. And, I am learning to be patient and teach them, instead of just getting mad about the mess.
The solution : That came in the form of my mother. She brought some bins over, and said she will help me organize and take away everything the girls own for awhile. We spent 2 hours yesterday just cleaning up the toys, separating them and putting them away. Today we will tackle the clothing. The plan is to remove everything except their beds/bedding. Each day they will have to come and get an outfit from me (my choice, not theirs to ensure they care and want the privilege of having their clothes back), and get their pajamas from me at bedtime. After a period of time, we will put one outfit on their shelf,or in the drawer, so that they don't have to ask for it. If they put it in the laundry at the end of the day, we will give two outfits back the next day. If they take care of that, another outfit will be returned, and so on. The same is true with the toys - we will be giving them back one type of toy (i.e. kitchen set, baby dolls, books, etc.), play with them, teach them how to put it away properly, and then give them a chance to do that. If they keep it put away, we will give back another type of toy.
Next project : My son's room, followed by the toddler playroom, again. We will be getting rid of some toys, as well. That causes trouble, when the kids have too many things. They simply don't know how to put them away, or keep them picked up. It is overwhelming for them. Heck, it is overwhelming for me, so I know it has to overwhelm them even more. In the end, though, they are learning good life skills of organization and having respect for their possessions. And, I am learning to be patient and teach them, instead of just getting mad about the mess.
Monday, February 20, 2012
It's definitely Monday
Jolted awake at 2:00 a.m. to the sound of crying...again. My littlest is teething, and he seems to be having trouble sleeping through the night because of it. Of course, this disturbance of sleep came after I had already been up for awhile due to a kink in my neck that wouldn't allow me to get comfortable in bed. I found a heating pad, took some ibuprofen, and played a few games of Farkle on the computer, waiting for some relief so that sleep could finally come. I got to bed around 1:15 from that little escapade. So, back to the crying. I hopped out of bed as quickly as I could, because the crying was first quite distressed sounding, but before I could actually get to him, he slowed to a whimper and then silenced altogether. I stood there, indecisive; should I get him some medicine or would that cause him to wake up and cry more? A quick prayer for wisdom, and then back to bed I went, deciding to wait and see if he continued to fuss.
Climb back into bed, adjust the pillow just perfectly so that my neck is supported in such a way as to keep the pain at bay, engage in a quick tug of war with the my sleeping, snoring husband over the blankets he has wrapped all around himself, leaving none for me, and then finally, I can get back to sleep. His alarm goes off at 5, the baby fusses again by 6, at which point I give him medicine and a sippy cup, and pray that he'll go back to sleep. My brain is groggy, my movements slow and sluggish, my head is pounding and I can't turn very far or look too far upward, because that kink is still there, despite the heating pad on it for the past 5 hours. I fall back asleep, off and on, for the next 45 minutes until my 4 year old climbs into my bed. I whisper that she needs to go try to go back to sleep, which she agrees to today (a rare thing, indeed), and close my eyes....."Dada, dada, dada...pbbbttttt!!!" My eyes open again with a groan, the baby is awake. I nearly hold my breath, hoping he'll just play happily or even go back to sleep, and it works for awhile....but not long. By 7:30, I'm up changing his wet-through diaper, and clothes.... this is not my favorite way to start a day, for sure.
Now it's a little after 9, and everyone has been fed, the older kids are doing their morning chores, albeit with quite a bit of bickering which frustrates me, and I feel as if I've been drug through an old-fashiong washing machine wringer; you know, the kind you had to do by hand that squeeeeeeeezed the water out of the clothes. Yeah, that's how I feel. There were no silly songs this morning during breakfast, just a huge effort on my part not to snap at the girls for constantly picking at each other and tattling : "She looked at me." "She said 'I love you'." <gasp> Oh no, how dare she say she loves you? Such a horrible sister you have, eh? hehe Welcome to...Monday.
Climb back into bed, adjust the pillow just perfectly so that my neck is supported in such a way as to keep the pain at bay, engage in a quick tug of war with the my sleeping, snoring husband over the blankets he has wrapped all around himself, leaving none for me, and then finally, I can get back to sleep. His alarm goes off at 5, the baby fusses again by 6, at which point I give him medicine and a sippy cup, and pray that he'll go back to sleep. My brain is groggy, my movements slow and sluggish, my head is pounding and I can't turn very far or look too far upward, because that kink is still there, despite the heating pad on it for the past 5 hours. I fall back asleep, off and on, for the next 45 minutes until my 4 year old climbs into my bed. I whisper that she needs to go try to go back to sleep, which she agrees to today (a rare thing, indeed), and close my eyes....."Dada, dada, dada...pbbbttttt!!!" My eyes open again with a groan, the baby is awake. I nearly hold my breath, hoping he'll just play happily or even go back to sleep, and it works for awhile....but not long. By 7:30, I'm up changing his wet-through diaper, and clothes.... this is not my favorite way to start a day, for sure.
Now it's a little after 9, and everyone has been fed, the older kids are doing their morning chores, albeit with quite a bit of bickering which frustrates me, and I feel as if I've been drug through an old-fashiong washing machine wringer; you know, the kind you had to do by hand that squeeeeeeeezed the water out of the clothes. Yeah, that's how I feel. There were no silly songs this morning during breakfast, just a huge effort on my part not to snap at the girls for constantly picking at each other and tattling : "She looked at me." "She said 'I love you'." <gasp> Oh no, how dare she say she loves you? Such a horrible sister you have, eh? hehe Welcome to...Monday.
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Legacies and Full Quivers
Psalm 127:3-5 Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.
4As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth.
5Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.
My husband, who is a hunter, informed me that generally, a quiver holds six arrows. I smile at that, because we have a full quiver, and are working on filling a second one. :-) Awesome!! Bring on the little arrows!!
A couple of months ago, I had a miscarriage. It has been the roughest couple of months in my life. However, I need to say that one of the good things that has come from it, is my appreciation for the little things, the little moments, with the children we have. My husband, and my children, are the motivators that have gotten me out of bed when I would've otherwise stayed curled up in the darkness for days on end. Why? They need me. Other people may fill in to change diapers, fix meals, and brush hair for awhile, but who can fill that spot inside of them that is marked "Mommy love" ? Nobody can. And, inside of every mommy is a spot marked with each child's name that only he/she can fill with their love. I don't favor one of my children over the others, but they each hold their own special place, a love-need if you will, that cannot be met by anyone else in the world. Carry that thought over to God as our Father, and us as His children ... think of how many special places he has in His heart, and how He needs us to love Him, because each of us has to fill our own spot of love inside of Him. That is a pretty neat thought.
Prior to my miscarriage, I have been dubbed a "clean freak", "the Bleach Queen", and other such titles per my love of cleaning. Since the miscarriage, cleaning hasn't mattered very much to me; I've basically been in survival mode. Every day, I get a little more like me, a little more back to normal with the kids, my husband, and life, in general. However, I just haven't resumed my "normal" cleaning obsession. This morning, as I vacuumed and cleaned a bathroom, I was thinking that it felt good to be cleaning again. I was also pondering how much more I enjoy not feeling obsessed about the cleaning, stressed that something wasn't perfect, and I enjoy that the kids don't feel like they can't breathe because of that obsession. Cleaning is good, yes, but life is all about relationship. I mean, I seriously doubt that when the kids grow up, the thing they'll remember best about their mom was that she loved to clean the house. So, what will my legacy be? What will their best memory be? It is my goal to be remembered for loving them so thoroughly that they had that "Mommy-Love Need" space inside of them full to overflowing!
I can say that my mom succeeded at that very thing! I'm so blessed to have a mother who loved me, and loves me still, so well that I never have a moment's insecurity or doubt about it. She is truly my inspiration for the way a mom should be.
Proverbs 31:28a Her children rise up and call her blessed..
Friday, February 17, 2012
"Mom, you're always going to be the best!" said by my 5 year old. Followed by, "You're the best chef ever!" as proclamation over the yogurt drink, chicken nugget and french fry lunch. ha ha ha
Highlight of today thus far was taking the kids shopping for Daddy's birthday gift, letting them pick out the gift bag, and help me put the gifts in. While looking for the tissue paper I was sure we had here, to go in the gift bag (that is blue and red and green, very non-girly since it's for Daddy), I could only find pinks and purples in tissue paper, and so.... pink and purple it is. :) He's secure in his masculinity, a little girly color on the package won't knock him off balance. hehe
Fun times, and I want to enjoy every moment. These little ones grow too fast; it feels as if every time I blink, they've changed again, grown another inch, and in some ways, need me less. So, with the most effort I can exude, I want to cherish the moments I am given. After all, ten, twenty, thirty years from now, the relationship I have with my adult children will be the result of what I build right now.
Highlight of today thus far was taking the kids shopping for Daddy's birthday gift, letting them pick out the gift bag, and help me put the gifts in. While looking for the tissue paper I was sure we had here, to go in the gift bag (that is blue and red and green, very non-girly since it's for Daddy), I could only find pinks and purples in tissue paper, and so.... pink and purple it is. :) He's secure in his masculinity, a little girly color on the package won't knock him off balance. hehe
Grreat Start
I am not a morning person, but having so many kids, I don't have much choice but to get up earlier than I'd like to. Well, I don't want to be grouchy with the kids, or give them the idea that mornings are not to be spent pleasantly amongst ourselves, so I have tried to do things like sing cute songs while making breakfast, "When birds wake up in the morning, they always say 'Good day'...they say "chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp", that is what they say" - and so that song goes. The kids love it, they like to tell me what animals, and people in our house say when they wake up. My mom sang that with me when I was a little girl, and I loved it, too.
Beyond just being cheerful, though, I want to raise my kids to love God, and to put Him first all the time in their lives. So, an idea that I feel came from God, was for us to do worship together in the mornings after breakfast. The older ones go get dressed and such while the younger ones finish eating, and then we all come together in the living room and sing a few songs together. We've made up some songs about how we only want Jesus living in us and some others. We sing Joy, joy, joy and Jesus Loves Me. We spend a few minutes praying together, asking God to help us with our day, to do our best in everything, etc. And the thing I find is that on the days we don't do this part of our routine, there tends to be more stress and bickering, etc. So, it's a lesson for Mommy as well as for the kids : Want a great start to the day? Start with God. As my friend said the other day, He's better than Frosted Flakes. hehe
Beyond just being cheerful, though, I want to raise my kids to love God, and to put Him first all the time in their lives. So, an idea that I feel came from God, was for us to do worship together in the mornings after breakfast. The older ones go get dressed and such while the younger ones finish eating, and then we all come together in the living room and sing a few songs together. We've made up some songs about how we only want Jesus living in us and some others. We sing Joy, joy, joy and Jesus Loves Me. We spend a few minutes praying together, asking God to help us with our day, to do our best in everything, etc. And the thing I find is that on the days we don't do this part of our routine, there tends to be more stress and bickering, etc. So, it's a lesson for Mommy as well as for the kids : Want a great start to the day? Start with God. As my friend said the other day, He's better than Frosted Flakes. hehe
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Ah....Bedtime
There is so much between "morning" and "bedtime", and yet, for today, I'm going to skip the in-betweens.
So, it's a "school" night (we homeschool) and the bedtime is 8pm. The youngest is definitely ready to lay down, after the 4th dirty diaper of the day has been changed and he's been given something for his poor little teething gums,and I've hugged and kissed, and prayed for him. Although he still wants to fold up that floor of the playpen and climb out, we struggle for a few moments while I insist that he lays down, and does NOT climb out! Finally, he concedes, and lays his cute little self down. One down, four to go....
The 8 year old : "Can I read til Daddy comes to tuck me in?" My response : "Sure, after you've put pj's on, brushed your teeth, and made sure your room is picked up." A slight slump of his shoulders is the response, because he knows, as do I, that his room is most definitely not picked up. However, despite his disappointment, he climbs onto my lap, wraps his arms around my neck, and tells me he loves me. I love these moments, because we don't have enough of them. What with all the other stuff going on around us all the time, it is hard to get enough snuggle time with each of them, so I treasure each time we have a moment. Anyway, I wrap my arms around him, and pray for him, kiss his sweet little face, and wait for him to plant those lips on my cheek as always. And off he runs, with a grin on his face, up the stairs to his room. My sweet boy. Two down, three to go...
The 5 year old comes next. She's a lover, oh my goodness. All of the kids are affectionate; hugging every chance they get through the day. And dinner, its like a lovefest, but that's for another day...another post.
So, back to my little Raindrop.... she is hugging and kissing the dog goodnight before she comes to me. Then, she walks over with that smile of hers that goes all the way to my heart, and just looks at me. I grab her to me, and pray for her, asking God to wrap her in angel wings (her nightly thing we pray for), hug and kiss on her, remind her to brush teeth and get her pajamas on, and send her up the stairs. Three down, two to go...
The 2 year old : Its more of a wrestling match than a hug with him. He moves and pulls, and falls to the floor, giggling all the while. I say a quick prayer for him, tell him how much I love him and beg him to sleep in tomorrow. He doesn't slow down enough to respond; he's in a total hurry to brush his teeth and see who he can laughingly tackle and pester. He is a ball of energy that hardly slows down long enough to sleep. Four down, only one to go...
The 4 year old comes down from her room where she's been in timeout, pops her head through the peep hole in the wall above the couch, and practically sings, "Is it bedtime?" "It sure is." "Yes!" she responds, and bounds down the steps, right over to me, huge grin on the face. I tell her to let Daddy get her diaper on her for bedtime (we're working on that, but I'm tired of washing bed linens over and over from all the nights she doesn't stay dry). She does, and bounces back over to me again. I hug her, which usually is returned, but she's in a silly mood tonight, so she bends and dodges a bit while I pray that Jesus wraps her up in "polka dot love" tonight. That's her thing, polka dots, so we've prayed that for her every night for as long as I can remember. Each one has their own kind of love we ask God to wrap them in each night... it's kind of becoming tradition now for us, and if I forget to say it, they are sure to remind me. Anyway, she goes on to brush her teeth.
My husband goes upstairs every night to tuck them in, and pray for them. I hear lots of giggles and shrieks of delight most of the time, because Daddy loves to tickle and play with the kids. You know, rile them up good before they lay down to sleep. haha Anyway, tonight is different. Instead of laughter I hear crying. You see, the girls trashed out their bedroom and playroom upstairs something terrible, and they were given last evening, and all day today to clean that up. Daddy told them that whatever he found not picked up was going into a big, black garbage bag. This is a repeated thing with them, trashing their rooms out, so we had to get a bit on the drastic side today. Unfortunately, I now have a bag full of clothes and toys in my closet. Hopefully this works. The crying subsides, and soft murmurs are heard, and my husband comes back down. All five are in bed, and the house is quiet. It's about 8:30 by this time, and we hope that the quiet is here to stay.
Time now for a few moments together, alone, before we also head to bed. Tomorrow is another day, one not to be faced without rest and renewed energy.
So, it's a "school" night (we homeschool) and the bedtime is 8pm. The youngest is definitely ready to lay down, after the 4th dirty diaper of the day has been changed and he's been given something for his poor little teething gums,and I've hugged and kissed, and prayed for him. Although he still wants to fold up that floor of the playpen and climb out, we struggle for a few moments while I insist that he lays down, and does NOT climb out! Finally, he concedes, and lays his cute little self down. One down, four to go....
The 8 year old : "Can I read til Daddy comes to tuck me in?" My response : "Sure, after you've put pj's on, brushed your teeth, and made sure your room is picked up." A slight slump of his shoulders is the response, because he knows, as do I, that his room is most definitely not picked up. However, despite his disappointment, he climbs onto my lap, wraps his arms around my neck, and tells me he loves me. I love these moments, because we don't have enough of them. What with all the other stuff going on around us all the time, it is hard to get enough snuggle time with each of them, so I treasure each time we have a moment. Anyway, I wrap my arms around him, and pray for him, kiss his sweet little face, and wait for him to plant those lips on my cheek as always. And off he runs, with a grin on his face, up the stairs to his room. My sweet boy. Two down, three to go...
The 5 year old comes next. She's a lover, oh my goodness. All of the kids are affectionate; hugging every chance they get through the day. And dinner, its like a lovefest, but that's for another day...another post.
So, back to my little Raindrop.... she is hugging and kissing the dog goodnight before she comes to me. Then, she walks over with that smile of hers that goes all the way to my heart, and just looks at me. I grab her to me, and pray for her, asking God to wrap her in angel wings (her nightly thing we pray for), hug and kiss on her, remind her to brush teeth and get her pajamas on, and send her up the stairs. Three down, two to go...
The 2 year old : Its more of a wrestling match than a hug with him. He moves and pulls, and falls to the floor, giggling all the while. I say a quick prayer for him, tell him how much I love him and beg him to sleep in tomorrow. He doesn't slow down enough to respond; he's in a total hurry to brush his teeth and see who he can laughingly tackle and pester. He is a ball of energy that hardly slows down long enough to sleep. Four down, only one to go...
The 4 year old comes down from her room where she's been in timeout, pops her head through the peep hole in the wall above the couch, and practically sings, "Is it bedtime?" "It sure is." "Yes!" she responds, and bounds down the steps, right over to me, huge grin on the face. I tell her to let Daddy get her diaper on her for bedtime (we're working on that, but I'm tired of washing bed linens over and over from all the nights she doesn't stay dry). She does, and bounces back over to me again. I hug her, which usually is returned, but she's in a silly mood tonight, so she bends and dodges a bit while I pray that Jesus wraps her up in "polka dot love" tonight. That's her thing, polka dots, so we've prayed that for her every night for as long as I can remember. Each one has their own kind of love we ask God to wrap them in each night... it's kind of becoming tradition now for us, and if I forget to say it, they are sure to remind me. Anyway, she goes on to brush her teeth.
My husband goes upstairs every night to tuck them in, and pray for them. I hear lots of giggles and shrieks of delight most of the time, because Daddy loves to tickle and play with the kids. You know, rile them up good before they lay down to sleep. haha Anyway, tonight is different. Instead of laughter I hear crying. You see, the girls trashed out their bedroom and playroom upstairs something terrible, and they were given last evening, and all day today to clean that up. Daddy told them that whatever he found not picked up was going into a big, black garbage bag. This is a repeated thing with them, trashing their rooms out, so we had to get a bit on the drastic side today. Unfortunately, I now have a bag full of clothes and toys in my closet. Hopefully this works. The crying subsides, and soft murmurs are heard, and my husband comes back down. All five are in bed, and the house is quiet. It's about 8:30 by this time, and we hope that the quiet is here to stay.
Time now for a few moments together, alone, before we also head to bed. Tomorrow is another day, one not to be faced without rest and renewed energy.
This Morning
Was awakened to the sound of Velcro being unfastened at 7:05 this morning. My 15 month old has figured out how to fold up the floor of the playpen he sleeps in, and use it as a step stool to climb out. So, I quickly get up, say "No, no, don't do that." and lay back down, hoping beyond hope that he'll just go back to sleep. No such luck! And thus begins another day for this Mama.
Hi, I'm Jena. I'm a 33 year old wife, and mother of 7. Our children range in ages from almost 13 to 15 months. The oldest two boys are from my husband's first marriage, so I'm not only a mom, but also a stepmom. It is nothing like the movies, where the kids hate you at first but you do some really awesome thing that only you can do, and they magically begin to accept you. Let me tell you, it is an uphill battle most of the time. The thing is, they have a mom and they love her. And, in this case, their mom's house is way less "ruled" than our house. Of course, she only has the two of them, so its easier to be lenient than when you have 5-7 children filling the house. So, there's that, and then there's the fact that I am the more outgoing, stricter parent here, and my husband is a meeker, milder kind of person... laid back, allowing, and unaware of the fact that the kids are even breaking the house rules half of the time because he just doesn't see it and think about it like I do.
But, my husband... where do I even begin? He is the most amazing man I've ever met! He is a simple country guy, but boy does he know how to love... not only me, but he loves God, and he loves our kids too. What more could a gal ask for? Nothing, that's what! He works hard, is faithful, dedicated his heart to following God, and he can't wait to get home to us every day. I'm greeted with loving hugs and kisses when he walks in the door every afternoon. I receive several texts and/or phone calls throughout the day telling me how much I am loved, and missed. His favorite country song is "If I Could Make a Living Out of Loving You" because he wishes he could get paid to demonstrate the extent of his love. I have to say, I am a blessed woman, for sure.
Anyway, a friend of mine made a comment about how she'd be interested to read about my daily life, as a mom, and it reminded me that I had been thinking to start a blog for that very reason.... to give a glimpse of a stay-home Mom of 5(or 7, depending on the day). So, here I am. It may not be the most glamorous, exotic, or even interesting, at times, but it is my reality... and maybe yours, too. So, I hope you can relate, be encouraged, and enjoy the tidbits of my life that I'm able to share.
With that said, it has taken me 15 minutes to type this much, because I've had to stop and break up a fight, put a child in timeout for telling me "No", answer questions, and hear my 8 year old describe the little game he's playing on his Leapster. I'll check in later. :)
Hi, I'm Jena. I'm a 33 year old wife, and mother of 7. Our children range in ages from almost 13 to 15 months. The oldest two boys are from my husband's first marriage, so I'm not only a mom, but also a stepmom. It is nothing like the movies, where the kids hate you at first but you do some really awesome thing that only you can do, and they magically begin to accept you. Let me tell you, it is an uphill battle most of the time. The thing is, they have a mom and they love her. And, in this case, their mom's house is way less "ruled" than our house. Of course, she only has the two of them, so its easier to be lenient than when you have 5-7 children filling the house. So, there's that, and then there's the fact that I am the more outgoing, stricter parent here, and my husband is a meeker, milder kind of person... laid back, allowing, and unaware of the fact that the kids are even breaking the house rules half of the time because he just doesn't see it and think about it like I do.
But, my husband... where do I even begin? He is the most amazing man I've ever met! He is a simple country guy, but boy does he know how to love... not only me, but he loves God, and he loves our kids too. What more could a gal ask for? Nothing, that's what! He works hard, is faithful, dedicated his heart to following God, and he can't wait to get home to us every day. I'm greeted with loving hugs and kisses when he walks in the door every afternoon. I receive several texts and/or phone calls throughout the day telling me how much I am loved, and missed. His favorite country song is "If I Could Make a Living Out of Loving You" because he wishes he could get paid to demonstrate the extent of his love. I have to say, I am a blessed woman, for sure.
Anyway, a friend of mine made a comment about how she'd be interested to read about my daily life, as a mom, and it reminded me that I had been thinking to start a blog for that very reason.... to give a glimpse of a stay-home Mom of 5(or 7, depending on the day). So, here I am. It may not be the most glamorous, exotic, or even interesting, at times, but it is my reality... and maybe yours, too. So, I hope you can relate, be encouraged, and enjoy the tidbits of my life that I'm able to share.
With that said, it has taken me 15 minutes to type this much, because I've had to stop and break up a fight, put a child in timeout for telling me "No", answer questions, and hear my 8 year old describe the little game he's playing on his Leapster. I'll check in later. :)
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